


i’ll be gone then when you must be alone

by wallaceandvomit



Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF, mcyt
Genre: Angst, Implied/Referenced Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-28
Updated: 2020-12-28
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:07:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28375911
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wallaceandvomit/pseuds/wallaceandvomit
Summary: Tubbo was under every impression that Tommy was dead, which was why seeing him stood beside Technoblade made his heart hurt all the more.ori'm a techno stan and a human second but i wish he would've shut up today when tommy and tubbo reunited so i wrote today's events from tubbo's perspective to calm down
Relationships: Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit
Comments: 4
Kudos: 114





	i’ll be gone then when you must be alone

Dream had helped Technoblade escape. He had helped the man who destroyed L’Manberg with withers escape. 

Tubbo was furious. He could feel his frustration bubbling inside him, stinging his eyes with tears. He listened to Quackity rage about Dream, he agreed, of course, but it was all just so much to handle at once. He nodded along as Quackity ranted, and when the meeting broke, he made a beeline for the community Nether portal.

It was all too much. He still hadn’t seen Tommy in his new home, and the guilt was dragging his heart along the ground. He needed to see him.

After a bit of navigating the Nether, he found a flimsy oak log bridge. It had to be the way to Tommy, he could feel it in his skin.

The little island was dotted with a Christmas tree, a few tents and some beach chairs. At one end of the land, he found a crater. His nerves started to run.

“What the hell?” He muttered under his breath, kneeling to inspect the rubble. “What happened here?” He stood again and looked around. His eyes caught on a pillar that stretched far into the sky, and his blood ran cold.

“What did he…” he trailed off, staring up at it in horror. “No”, he choked back a sob, “s-surely not…”

He took a step towards it. Tommy was gone. His stuff would have despawned by now if he…

Tubbo felt the world collapse around him. He fell to his knees, a scream ripping out of his throat. He cried, sobs crashing against the silence like waves. He felt his heart tear in two, the blood that seeped into the rest of his body a poison. He couldn’t breathe, the horror of his reality making his head fill with static.

Tommy was gone.

He let out another scream, his throat raw and his cheeks stained with tears. The last time he would ever interact with his best friend, his brother, would be to tell him he was selfish. To exile him from the country they built together. 

Tommy was gone. Tubbo wanted nothing more than to follow.

His days were grey. Lifeless. He could hardly force himself to get up in the morning, and at night he sobbed hollow tears into his pillow. 

If any of his subordinates noticed his state of emptiness, they said nothing. The most acknowledgment it got was the occasional concerned glance from Ranboo.

A week passed. A week of mourning every decision he made that drove him and Tommy apart.

When he saw Tommy standing before him, Technoblade at his side and Connor behind him, he nearly threw up. His heart started to race, his hands shaking and his eyes blurring with tears.

“I-I’m so confused”, he said, his voice cracking on every word. “You’re alive?” He asked, trying not to cry.

Tommy stared at him with a sick mix of disdain and betrayal. “Hello, Tubbo. Where have you been?”

Tubbo blinked back tears and found himself searching for words. “I… I’ve been here.”

Tommy, ever the leader, ever the soldier, ever child that grew up too fast, held his head high. “You exiled me. Do you remember when you exiled me?

He felt a lump form in his throat. “Yeah, I-I also remember when you died!” He cried.

He saw Tommy falter, his expression flicking to horror for just a second. Tommy looked at the ground, swallowed, then looked back up at him. “Tubbo…” he muttered.

“What’s- What’s going on here?” Tubbo asked, looking between the group of people.

Technoblade explained that they were taking Connor as a hostage in return for his weapons, but Tubbo barely registered his words.

“Wait”, he wiped his eyes, “Tommy, you’re with Technoblade?”

“Yeah.” Tommy stared Tubbo down, spite burning behind his eyes. “Yeah, I am.”

“Mutual interests, and all.” Techno shrugged.

“Yeah, because you exiled me. You left me- you left me absolutely no choice. You didn’t- you didn’t come and visit me once after I was exiled-“

“I did!”

“So don’t try and guilt me, Tubbo!” Tommy scowled. “You didn’t come to my party.”

“You didn’t invite me!” Tubbo cried.

Tommy’s fists balled and his brows furrowed. “No, don’t try and speak to me about this! Don’t try and speak to me about this! Dream said that you knew, I don’t wanna hear shit, alright? We’re here to get back the trident, and then I’m gonna get back the discs.” 

“I…” Tubbo stared at Tommy, his best friend, his brother, with a trembling lip and blurry eyes. “I was never invited.”

“I don’t wanna hear any of this shit, alright?” Tommy spat.

Tubbo forced himself to swallow the lump in his throat, blink back the tears. He traded Techno’s pickaxe and crossbow back- the crossbow he’d been killed with. He watched Tommy and Techno leave together.

When they finally left his line of sight, he collapsed. His knees gave out from under him with a sob, curling up and pulling his hair tight. Cries ripped out of him, tears staining his face and snot running across his parted lips. He distantly felt a hand on his back- Ranboo, he figured- but he made no move to acknowledge it. The pain digging into his heart was overwhelming, Tommy was alive- Tommy was alive! But Tommy didn’t trust him anymore. Tommy hated him. The thought made him scream, tugging sharply at his hair and forcing his forehead into the snow. His head and his hands felt like static, black and sharp like broken glass.

He faintly felt someone pick him up, hold him close to them. He curled into the fabric of their shirt and sobbed, hyperventilating with a severity that made him lose consciousness moments later.

Tubbo woke up in his bed in the presidential suite. There was a glass of water on the bedside table. The world had color again, but at what cost?


End file.
